Two friendless people.

Written by: Drew Z.Greenberg. Halfrek... Kali Rocha Jonathan... Danny Strong Andrew... Tom Lenk Warren... Adam Busch. Summary: Anya is back and after finding out that she can't seek vengeance in her own behalf, she tries to get her friends make a wish, a task that proves to be difficult. Later she finds comfort in alcohol and Spike.

Consequences of Hell's Bells. Anya working with a conflict of interest. Comfort from booze. And a hang over is not all they get. .

Quotes: Willow: Uh, you could, you could bring your friend. Tara: I wasn't gonna... I-I mean, if you have a friend... Willow: No! I'm, oh, I-I'm friendless. Tara: Yeah, yeah, no friends. I-I mean, I have friends... Willow: Right, many dear friends, yeah. Buffy: Guess this was kind of a lame sisters' day out, huh? I make up for trying to kill you by taking you to places you can't go in. Anya: Do you still want to get married? (when Xander doesn't answer) Oh. Xander: Ahn, it's a very complicated question. Anya: No, actually, it's really not. It's kind of an either-or deal. Do you want to get married? Xander: Someday, yes, very much. When we're ready. I don't want you to take this as a bad thing. It's good. I love you, I love you so much, I'm just trying to be honest with you. Anya: Yes, honesty *now*. Congratulations, Xander, on being honest now. I wonder what the medal will say. Xander: Okay, clearly I'm not handling this well. Anya: Well, duh! Anya: I wish you felt the pain of a thousand searing pokers boiling your heart in its own juices! Xander: I know, honey. I totally deserve that. Anya: I ... I wish you had tentacles where your beady eyes should be! I wish your intestines were tied in knots and ripped apart inside your lousy gut! Xander: They are. Anya: (hopefully) Really? Right now? Does it hurt? Xander: God, yes. It hurts so bad it's killing me. Anya ... I love you, I want to make this work. Anya: Those are metaphor intestines! You're not in any real pain! What's wrong with me? Dawn: Why don't I come patrolling with you tonight? Buffy: Oh. And then? Maybe we can invite over some strangers and ask them to feed you candy. Dawn: Well, you guys went out patrolling every night when you were my age. Buffy: True ... but technically, you're one-and-a-half. Willow: Well, if there's anything we can do, just let us- Anya: Actually ... um ... there is an eensy something I could use a little help with. You're lesbians, so the hating of men will come in handy. (cheerfully) Let's talk about Xander. Buffy: I don't think he could feel any worse. Anya: Let's test that theory. Buffy: Anya, Xander's my friend. I know what he did was wrong, and ... if it had happened to me, I'd... Anya: (hopefully) Wish his penis would explode? Willow: Well, Xander is a guy, so... it's kinda not the surprise that he likes to watch... girls... Why are we talking about this? Anya: We're comforting me! Tara: Well, I-I guess it's ... natural for guys to be interested in- Anya: God! What kind of lesbians are you?! If you love men so much, go love men! Anya: Oh my God. Spike *hates* Xander. Maybe I could get him to wish... dammit, if only he were a woman. Got it! If I can somehow get someone to wish that Spike were a woman, then I could go to him - well, he'd be a her by then, then I could go to her...

My review for the episode: Anya is back and it doesn't come as a surprise that she's a vengeance demon again. Xander has a good start at winning her sympathy and understanding, but then he goes and fucks it up. He just wants things to go back to the way they were before he left her at the alter, he really should have thought about what he wanted before he did something as hurtful as first leaving his own wedding without telling the bride and then leaving Anya to tell the guests that the wedding is off. All my sympathy goes to Anya. She really managed to be heartbreaking when she realized that Xander really didn't want to marry her and then truly funny as she keeps throwing wishes that don't work. Emma was absolutely great with both drama and comedy. And Anya joining Willow's and Tara's coffee moment and trying to get all Xander's friends make a wish for her is priceless. Tara's good heart is once again shown as she forgives Willow a bit too easily. Even though I like it that they started with coffee, I still think it all went forward too quickly. And Willow gives Tara a narration of what happened when she wasn't a part of the group, but I really didn't need to be reminded of the most boring/worst episodes (Gone, Doublemeat Palace and As you were) of the middle season. Tara is undeniably sweet, but she forgives Willow all too easily, with the issues they have I have a feeling that this way maybe their relationship wouldn't have worked in the long haul because of the rushing back into it without resolving the issues that broke them apart in the first place. But because Joss usually wants to give his characters a little happiness before yanking it away, of course Tara had to rush back to Willow without dealing with what ended their relationship because if she hadn't then her death in the next episode wouldn't have been as effective. But I love this more confident Tara who isn't just simply Willow's girlfriend anymore, I think she is strong enough character (and Amber Benson good enough actress) for her to become a part of the scooby gang without being Willow's girlfriend while they resolve their issues and get back together in the seventh season (but unfortunately that didn't happen). It's good to see Buffy spending time with Dawn and the girlie side of me has to state that Sarah is looking very pretty. But I have to ask how can Dawn herself pay for the stuff she stole since she has no job or any other income other than Buffy, so in other words it is Buffy who pays for the stolen items even when Dawn insists on paying for them herself. Just had to point that out since sometimes the little things (like that) in the dialog annoys me. But Dawn wasn't annoying in this episode which is a small miracle and loved Buffy's reaction to her suggestion that she could join the patrol. This episode has a lot of good point, I really liked the fight at the beginning and Spike dangling the vampire in the air, plus the vamps WTF?-look when Spike asked why Buffy won't sleep with him anymore was funny. But him refusing to believe that Buffy doesn't love him really can't be good. But the first scene he was in was pretty much the last scene I cared to see him in. Buffy did have a legitimate reason to suspect (because of Xander's suggestion) that Spike was the one doing the spying with the camera considering the happenings of season 5, but because it's a electrical gadget I think the nerds should have been a bigger suspect. But I hate how Spike plays the victim and him telling Buffy that he doesn't hurt her, he has done nothing but hurt her physically and emotionally (from Smashed onwards anyway). Him talking gets real old real fast and he gets no sympathy from me. He has been threatening to tell Buffy's friends about their former “affair” and it seems like more manipulation on Spike's part when he just happens to “accidentally” tell Xander about him and Buffy when Xander is spouting how Anya makes him sick because she let Spike touch her to feel something besides the hurt, a lot like Buffy whose reasons were darker and her pain much worse. Really, Xander lost all right to yap that crap when he left Anya at the alter, I have no sympathy for him. But it's interesting how when the spy cam is discovered and the scoobies see (quoting the nerds “porn” aka) Spike and Anya getting groiny, first thing Buffy does is to check on/glance at Xander. But I understand Buffy's “hurt” on seeing Spike humping Anya since he's been declaring his “undying love” for her and even though she doesn't love him it has to sting that the man/vampire who supposedly loves her is boinking her friend/friend's ex. But why is Dawn so surprised to find out about Buffy and Spike since she already heard about it from Buffy herself in the previous ep, of course it probably didn't stick considering the situation. Probably the best this episode had to offer was Anya trying to get the scoobies to make a wish to make Xander pay. Unfortunately this started to lose wind after Spike stepped into the Magic Box, though it gave Emma opportunities to shine and a insight into Anya's fear that maybe it was her fault that Xander left her at the alter. And just like now the chip can be prodded and understood by just about anybody, Anya isn't just a vengeance demon for scorned women, now she can grant just anybody's wish no matter what sex. I hate retconning! In The Wish Anyanka's summon went “I beseech thee in the name of all women scorned”, so that excludes men. Anyway, this had too much of the nerds, they're not funny, just boring and annoying, and Jonathan is the only one with redeeming qualities (well, a quality, because he feels guilt over Katrina's murder). Frankly their scenes could have been cut into two or three tops and even then made shorter. A 7 ½ bordering on 8 –, if it hadn't lost wind towards the end and if it had had less annoying nerds and “victim” Spike then it could have reached 8 -. But really this was Emma's opportunity to shine. 7 ½